Purple Giraffe
Scene One
(The Year 2030)
Narrator: Okay, where was I?
我讲到哪了？
Daughter: You were telling us how you met mom.
你在讲你怎么和老妈相遇的。
Son: In excruciating（excruciate （精神上）折磨） detail…
讲了一堆令人抓狂的细节。
Narrator: Right, so back in 2005 when I was twenty-seven, my two best friends got engaged. And it got me thinking, Maybe I should get married. And then I saw Robin. She was incredible. I just knew I had to meet her. That’s where your Uncle Barney came in.
对，2005年时，我27岁，我两个最好的朋友订婚了。这让我想到，或许我也该结婚了。然后我见到了罗宾，她真是美极了。我知道我一定要认识她。这时你们的巴尼叔叔出现了。
Barney: I suggest we play a little game I like to call,”Have you met Ted?”
我建议我们来玩一个小游戏我把它称为“你见过泰德吗”
Ted: No, no, no, we’re not playing”Have you met Ted!”
不不不，我们不玩“你见过泰德吗”
Barney: Hi! Have you met Ted?
嗨，你见过泰德吗？
Narrator: So I asked her out, and I know this sounds crazy. But after just one date, I was in love with her, whitch made me say something stupid.
就这样，我约她出去了，我知道这听起来很疯狂，但仅仅一次约会之后我就爱上了她，于是我说了一些糊涂话。
Ted: I think I’m in love with you.
我觉得我爱上你了。
Robin: What?
什么？
Daughter: Oh, dad.
哦，老爸啊。
Son: So then what happend?
然后发生了什么？
Narrator: Nothing. I mean, I made a complete fool of myself. So a week went by and I decided not to call her.
什么也没发生，我的意思是，我已经把自己变成了一个大笨蛋。所以一周过去了，我决定不给她打电话。
Marshall: So you’re not gonna call her? You went form ”I think I’m in love with you” to ”I’m not gonna call her?”
你不打算打给她了吗？你从“我觉得我爱上你了”变成了“我不准备给她打电话了”吗？
Ted: I wasn’t in love with her, okay? I was in love with the abstract（abstract 抽象的） idea of getting married! It had absolutely nothing to do with Robin. Robin!
我没有爱上她，好吗，我只是暂时爱上了结婚这个抽象的想法，这和罗宾绝对没有关系。罗宾。
Robin: Hey!
Lily: Look who I ran into!（run into 偶遇、撞上）
看我碰到了谁。
Ted: Since when do you guys know each other?
你们什么时候认识的？
Robin: Uh…since about here. Lily recognized me from the news and…Hello, Sailor!
大概从酒喝到这里的时候，莉莉从新闻中认出了我。悠着点，水手。
Ted: They just got engaged.
他们刚刚订婚。
Robin: Well, I should get back to the station. See you guys. Nice seeing you, Ted.
我该回电视台了。拜拜各位，很高兴见到你，泰德。
Ted: Yeah, you too. Damn it.
我也是，该死。
Lily: What?
怎么了？
Ted: I’m in love with her.
我又爱上她了。
Barney: No! As your sponsor（sponsor 保人、代父代母、赞助商） I will not let you relapse（旧病复发）. You blew it, it’s over,move on.
不行，作为你的后援，我不会让你死第二次的，你上次搞砸了，结束了，别想她了。
Ted: I don’t know! I just have this feeling. She’s the future Mrs. Ted Mosby. Lily, you squeaked?（squeak 吱吱叫） She said something about me didn’t she? Come on, spill it（spill 洒出、溢出，spill the ‘beans 泄露秘密）, Red.
我不知道，我只是感觉，她就是未来的泰德·莫斯比夫人，莉莉，你刚才叫了一声？她跟你提到我了是吗？快告诉我，红发女。
Lily: Fine.
好吧。
Lily: So what do we think of Ted?
那你觉得泰德怎么样？
Robin: Ted’s something else.
泰德和一般人不太一样。
Ted: Huh…I’m gonna spin（spin 尤指以有利于自己的口吻描述） that as good. Lots of guys are ”something”, I’m ”something else”.
哈？我要把这段当成好话。大多数男人都是一般人，我和一般人不一样。
Robin: He comes on a little strong.
他有点过于急躁了。
Ted: But…that’s part of my charm（charm 魅力）.
但那是我魅力的一部分。
Lily: But that’s part of his charm.
但那是他魅力的一部分啊。
Robin: Oh, totally. I mean, he’s sweet, he’s charming, he’s just looking for something a little bit more serious than I am. I mean the most I can handle right now is something casual. This just stays between us, right?
哦，当然是。我是说，他很亲切，也很有魅力，只是他想要的感情比我想要的更认真一点。我是说，我现在最多只是想要随意点的感情，这些话你不会说出去吧？
Lily: Are you kidding? This flapper（a young woman in the 1920s who wore fashionable clothes,had short hair and was interested in modern music and new ideas）,Fort Konx.（fort 堡垒、要塞，Frot Konx诺克斯堡，因金库安保森严闻名，库内存有美国大部分金条）
怎么会呢？我的嘴跟金库一样严实。
Lily: Oops…
啊哦。
Ted: She wants casual. Okay, I’ll be casual. I’m gonna be a mushroom cloud of casual. You know why? Cause it’s a game. I wanted to skip to the end and do the ”happily ever after” thing but you don’t get there unless you play the game.
她想要随意一些啊，好吧，那我就变得随意一些，我会变得相当随意，你们知道为什么吗，因为这就是个游戏，我之前想直接跳到结局，然后享受幸福快乐的生活，但只有玩了这个游戏才有可能到达那里。
Marshall: So’re you gonna ask her out?
那你要约她出去吗？
Ted: Yeah, no! I can’t ask her out, because if I ask her out I’m asking her out. So how do I ask her out, without asking her out?
是的，不对。我不能约她出去，如果我约她，那就是在约她了，我要怎样约她，才不显得在约她？
Lily: Did you guys get high?
你们嗑药了吗？
Ted: I got it! I don’t ask her out, I invite her to our party next Friday.
我知道了，我不约她出去，我邀请她参加我们下周五的派对。
Marshall: We’re having a party next Friday?
我们下周五要办派对吗？
Ted: We are now, casual.
现在要了，随意地办。
Barney: Yeah, cuz nothing says “casual” like inviting a hundred people over just to mack on one girl.(mack on someone: to make a sexual proposition to someone//to make out with someone) Oh, Lily, that’s my leg.
是啊，没有比邀请一百人来参加派对只为泡一个女孩更随意的事情了。还有，莉莉，那是我的腿。
Lily: You waited five minutes to tell me that?
你居然等了五分钟才告诉我？
Marshall: Alright, so call her up.
好了，那就给她打电话吧。
Ted: No, calling’s not casual! I just gotta bump into（bump（无意地）碰） her somewhere. Now, if only I knew her schedule I could arrange a chance encounter（encounter 邂逅、遭遇）.
不行，打电话一点都不随意，我得和她在某个地方偶遇，现在如果我知道她的行程，我就能安排一次偶遇的机会。
Lily: That’s great, Ted. You’ll be the most casual stalker（stalker 跟踪者） ever.
这很好，泰德，你将成为史上最随意的追踪者。
Scene Two
(The Apartment)
Narrator: Now, ever since Marshall put that ring on her finger, Lily had been…well…extra affectionate.（affectionate 柔情的、充满热爱的、爱慕的）
自从马修给她戴上订婚戒指后，莉莉变得，怎么说呢，充满柔情。
Marshall: Baby, no. I have a twenty-five paged paper on constitutional（constitutional 宪法的、章程的） law due on Monday, I’ve bareay started.
宝贝，不行。我周一要交一篇25页关于宪法的论文，我才刚刚开始写。
Lily: Hey, I’m just sitting here, wearing my ring…my beautiful ring. Kind of makes wearing other stuff seem wrong. My shirt. Kind of don’t wanna wear my shirt anymore. Or…my underwear. Oh, that’s right, I’m not wearing any.
没事，我只是坐在这儿，戴着我的戒指。我漂亮的戒指。有了它，我好像穿什么都不对劲，我的上衣，有点不想穿我的上衣了。或者我的内衣，哦对，我现在没穿内衣。
Marshall: No underwear?
没穿内衣是吧？
Lily: Not even slightly.（slight 轻微的，slightly 略微、稍微）
一点也没穿。
Ted: Guys, boundaries!（boundary 边界、界限） There she is!
伙计们，要有底线啊！她在那。
Robin: Thanks Bill, I’m reporting from the Razzle（razzle 旋转木马、喧闹） Dazzle（使目眩）（razzle dazzel 使人眼花缭乱、狂欢） Supermarket on 75th and Columbus.
谢谢你，比尔。我正从炫彩欢乐超市发回报道，这里位于75大街和哥伦布大街路口。
Ted: 75th in Columbus. Game on!
75大街和哥伦布大街路口。游戏开始。
Robin: …where four-year-old, Leroy Ellensburg, climbed inside a Grab-A-Prize（grab 抓） machine and gotten stuck.
四岁的小男孩勒罗·伊伦伯格爬进了一个娃娃机，并被困在了里面。
Robin: And on the pursuit（追求、寻找、追赶） of a stuffed（stuff 装填、塞满、东西、活儿、念头） purple giraffe. From Metro News One, I’m Robin Scherbatsky.
只为得到一个紫色长颈鹿玩偶。都市新闻一台，罗宾·舍巴斯基报道。
Camerman: We’re clear.
报道结束了。
Robin: Thanks, Don. Ted?
谢了，唐。泰德？
Ted: Robin, wow! What’s are the odds?（odds （事物发生的）概率、几率）
罗宾，哇哦，太巧了吧。
Robin: What are you doing here?
你在这干什么？
Ted: Oh, you know, just shopping for dip. I love dip…I mean I don’t love dip, I like dip. As a friend, you know. So, uh, hey, you reporting a news story or something?
哦，我啊，只是来买蘸酱。我爱蘸酱，不对，不是爱蘸酱，是喜欢蘸酱。朋友那种，你懂的。嘿，你是在报道新闻吗？
Robin: Yeah, a kid stuck in a crane（crane 起重机、吊车） machine, how sweet of you to call it news.
是啊，一个小孩被困在抓娃娃机里了。你把这叫做新闻太让我感动了。
Ted: Wow, kid in a crane machine. You just had to have that toy didn’t ya? Couldn’t play the game like everyone else.
哇哦，小孩被困在抓娃娃机里。你非要得到这个玩具，是不是呀？就不能像别人那样抓到吗？
Leroy: You’re all sweaty!（sweat 汗、流汗 sweaty 满是汗的）
你全身都是汗。
Ted: Cute kid, Um,you know, it’s so funny I should run into you. We’re having a party next Friday, if you like swinging by.（swing 摆动、秋千，swing by 短暂拜访、路经） But, you know, whatever.
小孩真可爱，对了，正巧在这里碰到你了，我们下周五有个派对，或许你可以顺便来看看。不过，随便你了。
Robin: Oh, I’m going back home next weekend. It’s too bad it’s not tonight.
哦，我下周末要回家。真可惜不是今晚啊。
Ted: It is, it’s tonight. This Friday, did I say next Friday? Yeah, sorry, cuz I’ve been saying “next Friday” all week, but yeah it’s tonight. The, uh, party’s tonight. But, you know, whatever.
就是今晚，这个星期五，我说下个星期五了吗，真不好意思，估计是因为我这一周都在说下周五。对，就是今晚，派对就在今天晚上。不过，是吧，随便你了。
Scene Three
(Marshall and Lily in bed after sex)
Marshall: Hello?
Ted: Hey, am I interrupting anything?
嘿，我没有打扰你吧？
Marshall: No, no I’m just writing my paper. Hitting the books.
没有，我只是在写我的论文，奋力啃书呢。
Ted: Yeah, well you and Lily might wanna put some clothes on. We’re throwing a party in two hours. Okay, bye.
好吧，那啥，你和莉莉最好穿上衣服。我们两个小时后要办个派对。就这样，挂了。
Scene Four
(The Party #1)
Marshall: So, Gatsby, what are you gonna do when Robin shows up?
帅哥，等会罗宾来了之后你准备怎么做。
Ted: Okay, I got it all planned out.
我已经都计划好了。
Ted: She steps through the door, and where’s Ted? Not eagerly（eager 热切的，渴望的） waiting by the door. No, I’m across the room at my drafting table showing some foxy（foxy 性感的，貌似狐狸的） young thing all my cool architecture stuff. So, Robin strolls（stroll 散步、闲逛） over, and I casually give her one of these, “Hey, what’s up?” She says, “Hey, nice place” etcetera, etcetera. （etcetera 等等、附加物）And then I say, “Well make yourself at home” and I casually return to my conversation.（conversation （非正式）谈话） Then, an hour later, “Oh, you’re still here?” I say, like I don’t really care but it’s a nice surprise. And then very casually, “Wanna see the roof?”
她迈进大门，这时泰德在哪呢？没有焦急地等在门口，而是在房间另一边地绘图桌前向某个年轻美女展示我那些超酷的建筑设计工具。这时，罗宾闲逛到我面前，我随意地对她说：“嘿，你好吗？”她说：“嘿，公寓不错呀。”什么什么的。接着我说：“那你好好玩儿吧。”然后我就随意地继续我之前的对话。接着，一个小时以后，“哟，你还在呀？”我用一种并不在乎但有点惊喜的口气说道。接下来，非常随意地：“想去屋顶看看吗？”
Lily and Marshall: The roof.
屋顶。
Ted: I get her up to the roof and the roof takes care of the rest.
我把她带上屋顶，屋顶就会搞定一切。
Barney: What’s so special about the roof?
屋顶有什么特别之处吗？
Lily: Oh, the moon, the stars, the shimmering（shimmer 闪烁） skyline. You can’t not fall in love on that roof.
月光柔美，星空如画，天际线若隐若现。在那样的屋顶上想不坠入爱河都难。
Marshall: We do it up there sometimes.
有几次我们在屋顶上就开搞了。
Barney: Solid（solid 不错（但谈不上出色）的、可靠的、固体） plan, my little friend.
计划不错啊，小个儿。
Ted: We’re the same height.
咱俩一样高好吗。
Barney: But may I suggest one little modification?（modification 修改，改进） That foxy young thing you were chatting up? take her up to the roof and have sex with her! Crazy monkey-style.
不过请允许我提出一点点改动建议，还记得一开始跟你聊天的那个美女吗？带她去屋顶，搞定她，用疯狂猴子式。
Ted: That’s not the plan.
这不是我的计划。
Barney: It should be the plan, I mean look at her. Ted, look at her. She’s smoking!
这应该是你的计划，不信你看看她，泰德，看看她，她多性感啊。
Fantasy Girl: Thank you.
谢谢夸奖。
Barney: Yeah.
不客气。
Ted: But she’s not Robin.
但是他不是罗宾。
Barney: Exactly! Ted, let’s rap. Statistic, at every New York party there’s always a girl who has no idea whose party she’s at. She knows no one you know, and you will never see her again. Do you see where I’m going, with this?
就是这意思，泰德，咱这么说吧，用数据说话，纽约的每一个派对里都会有这么一个女孩儿，她完全不知道自己在谁的派对上，她和你的圈子没有交集，你以后再也不会见到她。你明白我想说什么吗，明白吗？
Ted: Barney, I don’t think so.
巴尼，我不想这样。
Barney: Aargh! Scoping（scope 仔细看、彻底检查）, bip, scoping, bip.
搜索中，哔，搜索中，哔。
Lily: Man, you’re a dork.（dork 呆子、无聊乏味之人）
哎，你还真是个白痴。
Barney: Beep, beep, beep. Target acquired! And now it’s time we play a little game I like to call “Have you met Ted?”
哔哔哔哔，目标锁定，现在进入小游戏时间，我把它称为，你见过泰德吗。
Ted: No, come on, not this.
哦，拜托，别玩这个。
Barney: Hi, have you met Ted?
嗨，你见过泰德吗。
Tatiana: No.
Ted: Hi.
Tatiana: Hi.
Ted: Do you know Marshall? Lily?
你认识马修和莉莉吗？
Tatiana: No.
Barney: Hmm, do you know anyone at this party?
这个派对上有你认识的人吗？
Tatiana: I work with Carlos.
我是卡洛斯的同事。
Barney: Excuse me, anyone know a Carlos?
请等一下，有人知道谁是卡洛斯吗？
Ted: No.
Lily: No.
Barney: On a silver platter（platter 大平盘）! Bon appetite!（appetite 食欲、胃口、强烈欲望）
银盘奉上，慢慢享用吧！
Ted: I don’t think so.
我不会这样做的。
Barney: Your loss（loss 名词 损失、丢失、失败，lose 动词 遗失、损失）, her gain. （gain 获得、收益）Excuse me, can I show you the roof? It’s magical up there!
那你亏了，她赚了。不好意思，我能带你去看看屋顶吗？那上面美极了。
Tatiana: Sure.
当然可以。
Ted: Wait, wait, wait, hey. I got that roof reserved!（reserve 预定、保留、储备）
等等，屋顶我已经预订了。
Barney: Dude, Robin’s not coming.
哥们，罗宾不会来了。
Ted: Hey, she’s gonna show up. She’ll show up.
嘿，她会来的。她一定会来的。
Narrator: She didn’t show up.
她没来。
Lily: At least it was a great party.
至少派对办的很好啊。
Marshall: I ate like four whole cans of dip.
我差不多吃了慢慢四罐蘸酱。
Ted: You always know what to say old friend.
你总是知道怎么安慰我，老兄。
Ted: It’s Robin.
是罗宾。
Lily: Answer it.
快接啊。
Ted: No, no, no. Not right away（立刻、马上）. I gotta seem casual. Hello?
不行，我不能马上接，我得显得随意一点。喂？
Robin: I’m so sorry I missed your party.
真抱歉，我错过了你的派对。
Ted: Who is this? Merideth?
你是哪位，梅瑞迪斯吗？
Robin: Robin.
我是罗宾。
Ted: Oh, Robin! Hey, yeah, I guess you never showed up, did you?
哦，罗宾啊，嗨，你好，你好像一直没出现，是吧？
Robin: No, I got stuck at work, but they finally got that kid out of the crane machine.
是啊，工作脱不开身，不过，他们总算把小孩从机器里面救出来了。
Ted: Did he get to keep the purple giraffe?
那小孩得到那个紫色长颈鹿了吗？
Robin: Yeah, they let him keep all the toys. He was in there a long time and little kids have smaller bladders.（bladder 膀胱、皮囊） I wish your party was tonight.
是的，所有的玩具都送给他了，他在里面待的时间太长，小孩子膀胱小没憋住。要是你的派对在今晚就好了。
Ted: It is, the party’s tonight. Yeah, uh, it’s a two-day party. Cause that’s just how we roll. So if you wanna swing by its, uh, you know, it’s casual. See ya. So that was Robin.
没错，派对是在今晚。是的，我办的是双日派对，这就是我的行事风格。所以如果你想顺便过来的话，随意就好。我先挂了。刚才是罗宾打来的。
Marshall: What are you doing to me, man? I got a paper to write.
你怎么能这样对我啊伙计。我还有一篇论文要写呢。
Ted: I know, I’m sorry. It’s terrible, I’ll buy more dip.
我知道，我很抱歉，真对不起你，我会多买点蘸酱回来的。
Marshall: Ted! Ted, wait. Get French Onion. Can you believe this guy, I got a paper to write. Okay, fine, but it’s gotta be, like, super quick.And no cuddling（cuddle 拥抱） after.
泰德，泰德，等等，买法式洋葱味的。这家伙怎么能这样呢，我还有论文要写呢。好吧，来吧，但这次必须超快速解决。并且结束之后没有抱抱。
Lily: I’m the luckiest girl alive.
我真是活在这世上最幸运的女孩。
Scene Five
(Party #2)
Barney: Oh, you were so right about the roof. That girl from last night, I took her back to my place, then this morning took her outside, spun（spin-spun-spun） her around a couple times and sent her walking, she will never find her way back and there she is. How did she get here? Did you invite her?
哦，关于屋顶你说的太对了。昨晚那个女孩，我带她回了我家，然后今天早上送她出门，让她原地转了好几圈，再目送她离开，她绝对找不到回来的路，然后她在这儿出现了。她怎么找到这儿的，你邀请她了吗？
Ted: I have no idea of who that is.
我根本不知道她是谁。
Barney: She said she works with Carlos, who’s Carlos?
她说她是卡洛斯的同事，谁是卡洛斯？
Ted: I don’t know any Carlos.
我不认识叫卡洛斯的人。
Barney: Grr. Hi, you. You’re back.
嗨，是你，你又来了。
Tatiana: I sure am. Come on, sweetie, I need a drink.
我当然会来，来吧亲爱的，我想喝点东西。
Barney: “sweetie?” Really? Help.
亲爱的？真的吗？救我。
Ted: Whoa, whoa rabbits! Come on, I got that roof reserved.
喔，疯狂兔子们，别这样，屋顶我预定了。
Marshall: All right.
好吧。
Barney: So, it’s over between me and Works with Carlos Girl.
我和那个卡洛斯的女同事吹了。
Ted: Ooh, that was fast.
哦，这么快。
Barney: Yeah, I was trying to think what’s the quickest way to get rid of a girl you just met?
是啊，我刚才努力思考，怎样才能以最快速度摆脱一个刚刚认识的女孩。
Barney: I think I’m in love with you.
我觉得我爱上你了。
Tatiana: What?
什么？
Barney: Thanks, bro.
谢了，老兄。
Ted: Glad I could help. What the, no, no, no, no, come on!
真高兴能帮上忙。我的天，不不不，你们别这样。
Marshall: Sorry, Ted.
抱歉了泰德。
Ted: Great. What am I going to do when Robin shows up. She’ll show up.
这下好了，罗宾来的时候我该怎么办？她会来的。
Narrator: She didn’t show up.
她没来。
Marshall: All right, we threw two parties. Everybody had fun. Everybody Wang-ed, everybody Chung-ed. Now the kid has got to（=gotta） get to work, and the kid is not to be disturbed. Repeat after me, “I will not have sex with Marshall”.
好吧，我们已经办了两个派对了。大家都玩高兴了。大家酒也喝了，妞也泡了，现在小神童要去工作了。而且小神童绝不能被打扰，跟着我说一遍，我保证不和马修做爱。
Lily and Ted: I will not have sex with Marshall.
我保证不和马修做爱。
Ted: It’s robin. Hello?
是罗宾。喂？
Robin: Hi, Ted.
嗨，泰德。
Ted: Amanda? Oh, Denise, sorry you totally sounded like Amanda.
阿曼达吗？迪妮丝啊，抱歉，听着特别像阿曼达。
Robin: It’s Robin.
我是罗宾。
Ted: Oh, Robin, hi.
哦，是罗宾啊，你好。
Robin: I totally wanted to come, I got stuck at work again. I feel like I live there. I’m sorry I missed your party…again.
我确实很想过去来着，但我又被工作困住了，好像生活中只有工作一样。真的很抱歉，又一次错过了你的派对。
Ted: Hey, ain’t no thing, but a chicken wing, mamacita. Who am I?（ain’t=am/is/are not或has/have not 不是、没有，wing 翅膀，mamacita 辣妹、小妈）
嘿，芝麻小事何足挂齿呀小辣妹。这还是我吗？
Robin: I guess there’s no chance your two-dayer turned into a three-dayer.
我猜应该没有双日派对变成三日派对这样的事吧。
Ted: It did indeed, the party continues tonight. Yeah, last night people were, like, “Keep it going bro, party trifecta.”（quinella 头两名博（赛马头两名必须猜中，但次序不必正确））（perfecta <北美>正序连赢（对赛跑中前两名的顺序必须准确无误地进行预测的一种下注方法）词源perfect+quinella ）（trifecta 赛马赌博中押赌者以正确顺序押中前三，三连中、三连胜、接连三件大事 词源three+perfecta）
这个可以有，今晚派对依旧。昨晚大家都玩的特兴奋，都喊着再办一晚，派对三重彩。
Tobin: Wow, okay, well I’ll be there.
哇哦，好吧，嗯，我会去的。
Ted: Great, see you tonight. So that was Robin.
那太好了，今晚见，刚才是罗宾打来的。
Scene Six
(Party #3)
Narrator: So I threw a third party for Robin. On a Sunday night.
就这样，我为罗宾举办了第三个派对，在礼拜天晚上。
Barney: Oh, this is lame.
天，这派对真差劲。
Ted: Lame or casual?
差劲或者说随意。
Barney: Lame.
差劲。
Ted: Or casual?
或者说随意。
Lily: Hey, law books. Ready for a little 15-minute recess?（recess 休庭、休会、宣布暂停）
嘿，法律文库君，想来个十五分钟的小休庭吗？
Marshall: Sorry, baby, I gotta work. I need all my blood up here. Has anybody seen An introduction（introduction 导论、初次采用、介绍、前奏） to Contract, Tort（tort 侵权行为） and Restitution（restitution 赔偿、归还） Statues from 1865 to 1923? Anybody seen a big-ass book?
不行宝贝，我得工作，我需要把血液集中在上面。有人见到一本《1865至1923年合同侵权与赔偿法案导论》吗？有人见到一本厚的要死的书了吗？
Crowd: No, no.
没有。
Tatiana: Hello, Barney.
你好，巴尼。
Barnay: Of course.
好吧。
Tatiana: You look well. Is it weird they invited both of us?
你看起来气色不错，他们同时邀请我们俩是不是很奇怪？
Barney: Who? Who invited you? No one even knows who you are.
是谁？到底是谁邀请的你，根本就没人认识你。
Tatiana: I understand you’re hurt, but you don’t have to be cruel. Carlos was right about you.
我知道你很受伤，但是你不用这么残忍把。卡洛斯说的对。
Barney: Who is Carlos!?
到底谁是卡洛斯。
Marshall: Okay, where the hell is my–ohh! Okay, An introduction to Contract, Tort and Restitution Statues from 1865 to 1923, is not a coaster!（coaster 杯垫、沿岸贸易船） Ted! I’m jeopardizing（jeopardize=jeopardise 危及、危害） my law career so that you can throw not one, not two, but three parties for some girl that you just met who’s probably not even gonna show up. I mean where is she, Ted, huh? Where’s Robin? Hi, hi Robin.
嘿，我的书到底在哪–哦，好吧，《1865至1923年合同侵权与赔偿法案导论》不是个杯垫啊，泰德，我把对法律事业的追求放到一边，才让你办了不只一两场，而是三场派对，只是为了个你刚遇见的姑娘，那个姑娘甚至根本不会出现。她在哪里呢，泰德，罗宾在哪里呢？嗨，嗨，罗宾。
Robin: So you threw all these parties for me?
这么说，这三场派对都是为了我举办的吗？
Ted” No, oh, you thought that, no. I c–okay yes. You got me, one of the reasons I threw these parties was so that I could introduce you to uh, this guy. I figured（figure 认为、是重要部分、数字、算术）, you know, since it didn’t work out between us and now we can just laugh about it. Well, anyway Robin, this is.
不是啊，不是你想的这样，真的不是啊，好吧，是的，被你发现了，我办这三场派对的原因之一是我想向你介绍这个男人，我觉得吧，既然我们俩没能擦出火花，而且现在都能一笑而过了，不管怎样，罗宾，这是…
Carlos: Carlos.
卡洛斯。
Barney and Ted: Ohhh.
Scene Seven
(Party #3. Robin’s sitting with Carlos, happy)
Ted: She’s still talking to Carlos. I can still win this, it’s not over.
她还在和卡洛斯聊天呢，我还有希望，事情还没完呢。
Lily: Okay, buddy, time for the “tough-talk”. Robin seems great. But let’s look at the facts, you wanna get married and right now there’s a million women in New York looking for exactly you, but Robin ain’t one of them.
好了，兄弟，说句你不爱听的吧。罗宾是不错，但是面对事实吧，你想结婚，而且现在纽约有无数女人正在寻找像你这样的对象，但是罗宾不是其中之一。
Ted: She’s not just “one of them”, she’s the one.
她的确不是其中之一，她是我的那个唯一。
Barney: Yeah well, “the one” is heading up to the roof.
对哈，你的唯一要去你的屋顶咯。
Marshall: What are you gonna do?
你准备怎么办。
Ted: Nothing. It’s a game, I gotta just keep playing it.
什么都不做，这是一场游戏，我只好就一直玩下去。
Robin: Hey.
Ted: Hey. Carlos, can you give us a minute?
卡洛斯，能让我们单独呆一会儿吗。
Carlos: Hey, no sweat（没什么、小事一桩）, hombre.（hombre （尤指某类）男人）
没问题，伙计。
Robin: See you.
回见。
Ted: Robin, look, I didn’t invite you to this party to set you up with Carlos. Or the one before that, or the one before that. I threw these parties because I wanted to see you.
罗宾，听着，我办这场派对不是为了把你介绍给卡洛斯，前一场也不是，前前一场也不是，我办这些派对是因为我想见你。
Robin: Well, here I am.
好吧，我来了。
Ted: There’s something here, look, unless I’m crazy.
我们之间一定有些情愫在，除非是我疯了。
Robin: You’re not crazy. I don’t know, Ted, I mean we barely know each other and you’re looking at me with that look and it’s like…
你没疯，我不知道，泰德，我们几乎不了解对方，但是你的眼神就好像要对我说…
Ted: What,like what?
什么，说些什么。
Robin: It’s like, ‘let’s fall in love’, ‘and get married and have kids and drive them to soccer practice.’
好像在说，我们恋爱吧，然后结婚生小孩吧，开车送他们去足球场吧。
Ted: I’m not gonna force sports on them unless they’re interested.
除非他们自己感兴趣，否则我不会强迫他们运动的。
Robin: It’s a great look. But you’re looking at the wrong girl.
你的眼神很温柔，但是你找错人了。
Ted: No, I’m not.
我没有。
Robin: Yes, you are. I don’t wanna get married right now, maybe ever and if we go out together I’d feel like I’d either have to marry you or break your heart and–I just couldn’t do either of those things. Just like you can’t turn off the way you feel.
你的确找错人了。我现在不想结婚，或许永远都不想。如果我们在一起了，我会觉得我要么就得和你结婚，要么就伤透了你的心，但是这两件事我都做不到，就像你关不住你的感情一样。
Ted: Click. Off. Let’s make out.
咔哒，关掉了，我们亲热吧。
Robin: What?
什么？
Ted: What? That was the off switch, and I turned it off. I mean, sure yes, I wanna fall in love, get married blah, blah, blah, but, on the other hand, you, me, the roof.
怎么了，那是感情开关啊，我关掉它了。我的意思是，没错，我想要谈恋爱结婚之类的，但是，换个角度想，你和我，在这屋顶。
Robin: There’s no off switch.
根本就没有感情开关。
Ted: There is an off switch, and it’s off.
真的有感情开关，而且我把它关了。
Robin: No, it’s not.
你关不掉的。
Ted: Yes, it is.
我关了。
Robin: No, it’s not.
你没有。
Ted: Yes, it is. No it’s not. You’re right, there’s no off switch. God, I wish there was an off switch.
是的，我关了。不，它没关掉。你是对的，感情根本就没有开关之说，天哪，我真希望感情可以说关就关。
Robin: Me, too.
我也是。
Ted: So. What do we do now?
那，我们现在要做什么。
Robin: We could be friends.
做朋友吧。
Ted: Oh.
Robin: Look, I know it souns insincere when people say that but we could.
听着，我知道这听起来有点假，但是我们可以的。
Ted: I don’t know, Robin. I made such a jackass（Jackass 笨蛋、傻瓜） out of myself here, we start hanging out, every time I see you, it’ll be like, “Oh, that’s right, I’m a jackass.”
我不知道，罗宾。我把自己变成了一个笨蛋，我们开始一起玩，每次我看到你，就像是，哦，对了，我是个笨蛋啊。
Robin: You’re not a jackass. I’m sorry. I only moved here in April and I’m always working and I just haven’t met a lot of good people so far. But I understand.
你不是笨蛋，我很抱歉，我四月份才搬来的。而且我一直在工作，到现在我都没有遇到多少正经人，但是我明白的。
Ted: Well, uh, maybe in a few months after it’s not so fresh, we could all, uh, you know, get a beer.
好吧，也许几个月后，你对这里熟悉些了，我们可以一起去喝一杯。
Robin: Yeah, that sounds good. I’ll see you, Ted.
好，听起来不错。回见吧，泰德。
Ted: Or, you know, now. We could all get a beer now.
或者，就现在。我们现在就可以一起喝一杯去。
Robin: I’d like that.
乐意至极。
Ted: My friends are gonna love you, like you, you know, as a friend.
我的朋友会爱上你的，喜欢上你，以朋友的身份。
Barney: Unbelievable, that is just a recipe（recipe 秘诀、方法、食谱） for disaster, they work together.
简直不敢相信，那肯定会导致灾难的，他俩可是同事啊。
Ted: You jealous?（jealous 吃醋的，忌妒的，珍惜的）
你嫉妒了吗。
Barney: Oh, please, what does Carlos have that I don’t?
噢，拜托。卡洛斯有的我什么没有啊。
Robin: A date tonight?
今晚的一个约会吗。
Marshall, Lily and Ted: Ohh!
Lily: Stop the tape, rewind（rewind 倒带; wind /waind/ 卷绕、迂回、转动； wind /wind/ 风、（随食物或饮料）吞下的气）, play it again.
停，倒带，再说一遍。
Robin: A date tonight?
今晚的一个约会吗。
Marshall, Lily and Ted: Ohh!
Barney: I’m not sure I like her.
真不好说我喜不喜欢她。
Ted: Hey, don’t you have a paper to write?
嘿，你不是还要写论文吗。
Marshall: Dude, you’re talking to the kid.
兄弟，你可是在和我小神童说话。
Ted: I know it.
我知道。
Marshall: I’m gonna knock back（很快喝掉（酒等）） this beer. I’m gonna knock back one more beer. I’m gonna go home, I’m gonna write a twenty-five page paper. I’m gonna hand it in and I’m gonna get a A. My name is Rufus, and that’s the Trufus.（用Rufus这个名字和trufus押韵，因为trufus听起来像truth，事实、真理）
我现在要干了这杯啤酒，我还要再干一杯啤酒，然后我回家，写一篇25页的论文，交上去并且得到一个A。这对我来说就是小菜一碟。
Narrator: He got a B-Minus.（minus 减） But still, twenty-five pages in one night, B-minus? The kid was good.
他得了个B-，不过一晚上写了25页还得了B-，小神童还是有两下子的。
Ted: At least let me buy you a beer. Come on I’ll buy everyone a beer.
最少让我请你喝一杯吧，来吧，下轮我请客。
Robin: I’ll help carry. You know something, Ted?
我来帮你拿，你知道吗，泰德，
Ted: What?
Robin: You are a catch.（理想的对象、意中人、接住、抓住） You’re gonna make some girl very happy, and I am going to help you find her.
你很有魅力，很会讨女孩子欢心的，而且我要帮你找到那个人。
Ted: Well, good luck. I mean maybe New York’s just too big a town, you know? There’s millions of people in this city. How, in all this mess, is a guy supposed to find the love of his life? I mean, where do you even begin?
好吧，祝你成功。我觉得，也许纽约太大了，这城市里有上百万人，在这种情况下，一个男人要怎样找到他的真爱。到底从哪儿开始呢。
Robin: Hi, have you met Ted?
嗨，你见过泰德吗。
Ted: Hi, I’m Ted.